“Its not whats being said here,…”

white-light-ajaytao1 “…it’s whats not being said here.”  I am sick and tired of people lying. Why do I say this?  Because the lying we do, and I include me, is destructive to my soul.  One of the most refreshing thing I have heard in a long time was a speaker at a meeting yesterday. He was a retired police officer and he owned that he treated people really really rude when he was arresting them because of his disease.

white-little-bud-ajaytaoThose who read this blog know that I believe that we dont suffer from alcoholism, or mental health problems,  but that we suffer from emotional health disorders.  As I sit here today I see that the emotional health disorders we suffer with are not going to be addressed as long as we see the world through the paradigm we look at the world through.

“I just want you to tell me the truth.” I just heard a friend say that “I need to be white-rose-ajaytaoaround something, some one.” When that is the exception, when that is the need that is uncommon, we are in this place where being alone is normal.  I am not talking about any of the other people who I know who dont suffer with emotional health problems.  I was in a meeting last night and a newcomer said that he was amazed that we would have a meeting where we dealt with depression and anxiety.   Yet when I read that Depression is supposed to increase by 500% in the next twenty years, I thespesia-lampas-ban-kapas-ajaytao-1-1have fear.  Fear that we will isolate so much that we dont see other people.  Not in the physical sense, but in the emotional sense.  When I am with my friends what I get is the acceptance and the mirroring that  I need.  Like a baby in the crib needing the mother’s eyes, voice and touch to be able to understand themselves I have those needs as an adult also.   I need to know that my existence has value beyond my self and I only learn or re-learn it when I am engaged with you!

white-buds-ajaytaoI also just heard that Leonard Nimoy just passed away.(We are way too connected in the world arent we.) It did not affect me like the death of Robin Williams did, but it did put a time stamp on my life.  It made today more “real,” because that image of Spock and Kirk roaming space was always an image of hope in a way for me as a child.  It was imaginative and interesting.  Star Trek and Star Wars both had star in their titles and the same mythological rose-b-w-7-ajaytaosymbolism.  Both of them were about the hero’s journeys and allowed people to experience the imaginative world which we are more and more disconnected from.

123 RV, SA, PH, PA, JW, RW, JZM, TL!





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