“You let go, freefall into the unknown,…”

326684    “…and allow something powerful to happen.” (1)   Therein lies a huge rub for me.  “I” created a wonderful career for myself as at attorney and there is a part of me that says that I had my one chance and that I blew it by losing my position and authority and wealth that came with the position.  But I was just doing it for the reasons that were not of my own making.  Sure I could say that I was doing it for my family, but I decided to be an attorney well before any family came along.
I thought that I had to do it to “be,” somebody.  I had to have a title  and a position in society that “made,” people give me respect.  I thought that I did not deserve it until then, and still struggle with that to this day. My self image in the mirror tells me more about where I am, in my own mind, in my life than anything else does.
catseye3_hst_960“How else can you obtain the power that is not in your full control?”(1) I was taught early on in life that there was no power greater than myself. I  divorced myself from religion when I found out and saw the hypocrisy of “being,” religious in a small town where it was who you knew which was the most important thing.  I knew it and it caused me to walk away from the “God,” that everyone thinks is the one and only power greater than  our self  out there.
screen-shot-2013-07-08-at-11-52-32-amBut as I get farther and farther into this blind journey I am on, I start to see that no one has the “right,”  idea of any power greater than myself.  I have learned that religion as it is practiced today where I live, is about power and control.  I know, I  know, I am going to get under the skin of some, and I support you having your opinion and if you really believe in it, then create a blog to espouse it.  Because I see it as pedagogy that limits.  Joseph Campbell said it best when he said, “Ggod is a metaphor for all that is beyond intellectual.  It is that simple.”  Why we continue to try and think that we can use our minds to understand something that is beyond the ability of our minds is almost funny, if it didn’t have such dramatic and also traumatic consequences.
snowtrees_bonfadini_960“People who lived with this don’t follow the crowd.” (2)  What Moore talks about here is the term,  “Daimon.”  I bet when you first looked at that word you thought demon didnt you?  Well that is not  what Moore/Hillman et al., are talking about.  I would best describe it in my words as the “life force.”  That part of me that says that what I am doing by getting my license as as psychologist and helping others and my writing is what I  was meant to do.
(1)Thomas Moore, A Life at Work  pp I38–139  (2) Thomas Moore, A Life at Work  126

123 RV, SA, JW, RW, PA!

wolf yosemite

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s