I watched the movie “Of Mice and Men,” last night with John Malkovic and Gary Sinise. I read the book along time ago for a class and I thought that I wouldn’t be affected by it to the extent I was, but I was.
What is it that the movie stirred in me? In my depression, I am more like Malkovic’s character, Lennie. Not just the slowness mentally, but more than anything the almost childlike personna with the quickness to anger that he would exhibit when he was beyond his comfort zone in personal interactions and his ability to control things.
But the part of the movie that disturbed me, made me realize the power of life is the ending, when George has to kill Lennie. What was that for me? The killing of our childlike part of our personality because sometimes it makes mistakes. Well hell, my childlike, impetuous, spontaneous, present in the moment characteristics had to leave, be forgotten, to continue down the path I chose once I decided to go to law school instead of studying and becoming the healer, teacher and protagonist that I really am.
That part of my character that angers when I see abuse or threat, that part of me that adores living in the moment as it satiates my need to be as complete as I can. Lennie’s mental illness was seen as a negative, but many of the people, especially George, admired and respected Lennie’s ability to live in the intuitive world he did. We cant do that, as a culture.
“It’s not about meaning anymore, it’s about survival.”  George killing Lennie at the end of the movie, the killing of the intuitive self by the rational self, even it is for the “intuitive self’s” best interest, it what we are doing. We are surviving and not living lives of meaning because it is something we have to do to survive.
George did not want to kill Lennie, but he knew that if he didnt do it, the others would have caught Lennie and brutally killed him all the while making him suffer or live in the knowledge and fear that he was about to die.
What I am saying is that we have to be George again and not kill Lennie. We need to say to the world, yes we are not perfect, we are slow to learn and sometimes dont remember and learn how we are expected to do. This dis-ease we have is not necessarily because there is something we are, but is something that we are manifesting.
We are not retarded in any way, we are working through the issues that bring about the condition we are in. We are not the cause of our dis-ease, we are just living out what is going on for all of us. Lennie was as loving as anyone, but he suffered with a condition that came about because of abuse.
We are carrying the qualities that we all despise so much that we stick our head in the sand about it or label the “Lennies”of the world as no good and evil. WE ostracize those of us who suffer with what we should all be responsible for. The dis-ease and spiritual malady that WE all are suffering from.
 James Hillman
123 Everyone! Forgiveness comes from the intuitive self, permission is necessary for the rational self.